Quotes from The One Where Joey Speaks French

Chandler: So where's Mike?
Phoebe: Oh, he's at the doctor. He didn't poop the whole time we were there.

Monica: These are for Erica.
Ross: What, she's gonna eat all those cookies?
Monica: Well, I want the baby to come out all cute and fat.

Ross: I'm sure you have a great excuse. What was it, a hair appointment? A mani/pedi? Was there a sale at Barney's?
Rachel: My father had a heart attack... while I was at Barney's.

Dr. Green: So what's new with you, Geller? Knocked up any more of my daughters lately?
Ross: Nope, just the one.

Ross: I haven't had sex in four months, I should get a medal for that.

Chandler: New York is awesome!

Erica: He killed his father with a shovel. But other than that he's a great guy.
Chandler: I'll bet his dad doesn't think so.

Monica: Are you awake?
Chandler: Of course I'm awake. Assume from now on that I'm always awake.

Rachel: In the future, when a girl asks for some ill-advised sympathy sex, just do it.

Ross: I gotta say, I have not had sex a lot of times before, this is the worst ever.
Rachel: Oh, really? Really? Well, it wasn't very good for me either.

Joey: Tout e la smore!

Ross: Damn it, it's never off the table.

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