Quotes from
The One with the Holiday Armadillo

Ross: I think I want to take this year to teach him all about Hannukah.
Phoebe: And maybe I could teach Ben about the Christmas skull and how people die.
Rachel: You may need to use this year to teach Ben about Phoebe.

Chandler: Hey, you know what I was thinking? When we get married are you gonna, uh, change your last name to Bing?
Phoebe: Nope.
Chandler: Why not?
Phoebe: Bing's weird.

Ben: Jingle bells, jingle bells!
Ross: Okay, that's right, yes, but on Hannukah we sing, "Dreidle, dreidle, dreidle, I made you out of clay..."
Ben: Rudolph the red nosed reindeer....!
Ross: Okay, it's not a contest.

Chandler: If you want to get Joey a Christmas present that disrupts the entire building, why not get him something a little bit more simple, like a wrecking ball or a vial of smallpox to release in the hallway?

Rachel: I had a tarantula when I was a kid, but it died because my cat ate it, and then... and then my cat died.

Ross: I'm the holiday armadillo!

Ross: What are you doing here, Santa?
Chandler: Well, I'm here to see my old buddy Ben. What are you doing here, weird... turtle man?

Monica: Okay, Ben, why don't you come open some more presents? And Santa, the armadillo and I will have a little talk in the kitchen. There's a sentence I never thought I'd say.

Chandler: If Santa and the holiday armadillo are ever in the same room for too long, the universe will implode. Merry Christmas!

Rachel: Wow, it looks like the Easter Bunny's funeral in here.

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