Quotes from
The One With Phoebe's Rats


Rachel: Don't sing out loud, Gunther's gonna want to hug me.

Rachel: You really think she's hot?
Chandler: Are you kidding? If I wasn't married she'd be rejecting me right now.

Ross: So hot, I cried myself to sleep last night.

Mike: I don't want to freak you out, or anything, but I think I just saw a rat in your cupboard.
Phoebe: Oh, yeah, no, that's Bob.

Rachel: He didn't have a last name. It was just, just Tag. Y'know, like Cher, or, y'know, Moses.

Monica: Would you stop staring at her?
Chandler: I wasn't staring... I was leering.
Monica: What's the big deal with her? Maybe she's attractive in an obvious kind of way.
Ross: Yeah, obvious beauty's the worst. Y'know, when it's right there in your face. Me? I like to have to work to find someone attractive. Makes me feel like I earned it.
Chandler: Looks like Joey's doing all right over there.
Monica: Yeah. Hey, that was nice of you guys to back off and let Joey get the girl for once.

Phoebe: What are you doing?
Mike: Setting rat traps.
Phoebe: To kill Bob?
Mike: No, no... to test his neck strength.

Chandler: You know as well as I do, once Joey sets his mind on something, more often that not he's going to have sex with it.

Ross: Nannies like her don't grow on trees.
Chandler: Picturing that tree?
Ross: I am, yes.

Joey: Hot nanny and me against the world! This is the kind of stuff great novels are made of.
Chandler: Great novels?
Joey: Fine, mediocre porn.

Rachel: Do you see what all the guys see in her?
Monica: Wouldn't kick her out of bed. No more vodka for me.

Phoebe: These are my rat babies!
Mike: Yeah, we have rat babies now.

Mike: When did we become one of those couples whose lives revolve around their rats?


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